June 4, 2008 - It’s the one game your mother let you play when you were young because any violence was limited to a well-placed banana peel or red shell. Sexuality was Princess Toadstool swathed head-to-toe in pink fabric and a tiara. Swearing? Undoubtedly, it was only heard from your older brother after you beat him on Rainbow Road for the tenth time in a row.

With such a clean-cut record, it’s no surprise that the Mario Kart legacy had resulted in at least one title on every Nintendo console since the original SNES, as well as two different arcade editions in sixteen years of success. Thankfully, it seems like the Mario Kart track has no finish line in sight.

It was with a certain amount of trepidation, however, that I popped Mario Kart Wii into my system. Would the steering wheel/Wii-mote combination ruin the experience, the thrill of the race? Would it be able to top the Double Dash or DS editions? Would it even be comparable?

I needn’t have worried.

Each track is better, brighter and more true to the original Mario Kart line of thinking. Each character is more…character-y, as wholesome as apple pie. There are more of them, as well as old favourites. The karts and the new addition of motorbikes are cute and kitschy and very Marioesque. This game is tight. Like, waterproof tight.

Nintendo has certainly upped the ante this time, using the Wii’s versatility as a console to draw new and old players back to the track with the added attraction of the Wiimote steering shell. Players can now choose between the steering wheel, the Wiimote/nunchuck combination, the classic controller or the GameCube controller, allowing for any level of gamer to feel comfortable at the helm.

Though my personal favourite will always be the GameCube controller, I was intrigued by the steering shell. It’s a really neat concept and I’m all for neat concepts, so I wanted to give it a fair shot. Really, I did. But I really look like an idiot when I’m using it. Nobody looks intelligent holding a white plastic steering wheel in midair while cursing at the screen. I just felt dumb.

However, I have to give the developers props for this one. The invention of this wheel adds yet another Wii accessory to the already over-abundant list of “required” Wii stuff that is generally useless and currently cluttering my living room space. Never mind that these products don’t really add anything to the game, cost a small fortune and are really just a giant supplemental cash cow for Nintendo.

Fine, fine, I’ll admit it, the wheel is fun. The wheel is cute. The wheel is funny when you’re in a room full of friends, so you can grab the wheel of the person beside you and steer them off course. I get it. People like the wheel.

The problem is that the wheel isn’t as accurate as any of the controllers, and to a lesser extent, the Wii-mote/nunchuck combo. You don’t get that definite edge over your opponents, that extra dexterity when it comes to navigating the crazed corners of Rainbow Road in a 150cc race. As well, the much-touted stunt boosts created by waggling the wheel/Wii-mote when taking off a jump can make for tricky landings and difficult steering, and it just isn’t worth it a majority of the time.

Controls aside, it’s the tracks that make or break every new edition of Mario Kart and this one is no different. The sixteen new tracks are inspired, ranging from simple and beautifully rendered (Moo Moo Meadows, Luigi and Mario circuits, respectively) to jaw-droppingly complex and a example of creativity (Maple Treeway, Koopa Cape, Mushroom Gorge). The sixteen retro tracks have been re-mastered in exquisite 3D, while never loosing that old school look we cherish in a Mario Kart title. Oh, and Rainbow Road? This version is the best ever, hands down.