January 21, 2008 - Godzilla: Unleashed is the gigantic foam-suit flop available for the Wii and PS2 developed by Pipeworks and published by Atari. There’s word online that a PSP version is planned for 2008 and I can only sacrifice so many Care Bears to the video game gods in hopes that this doesn’t happen.

Godzilla: Unleashed is basically a random button-mashing 3D melee fighting game. Whether in Story (single-player) mode or Brawl (multiplayer) mode the gameplay is essentially the same: walk toward your opponent the best you can while pressing random buttons as fast as you can. All of the monsters in Godzilla: Unleashed are known as “kaiju” (Japanese for “strange beast”) and each kaiju is a member of one of four Factions: Earth Defenders, Global Defense Force, Aliens, and Mutants. The Story mode explains more about these four Factions as well as why they are out to find crystals and so forth. To be honest the boring comic-like graphics of the cut-scenes mixed with atrocious voice acting (bad even for the Godzilla brand) I couldn’t care less about Godzilla, why he’s unleashed, or why he and his friends lack any identifiable genitalia.

Controlling your kaiju in this game is as clumsy and frustrating as writing your name with a pen clenched between your butt-cheeks. Each monster has the generic punch (high) attack and kick (low) attack using the X and square buttons respectively. The circle button unleashes a fierce attack that is unique to each character and is stronger than the standard punch or kick. Blocking is available via the triangle button. Throwing your opponent or other items (rocks and buildings) is done by holding down the L1 button then pressing the X, square, or circle buttons. Monsters have weapon attacks usually used for distance damage and some have other special abilities. The controls appear to be on some sort of delay (perhaps to give the feeling of the humongous size of your monster) which further reduces the odds of pulling off any move purposefully. It’d be easier to pee upwind of a 747 and stay dry than it is to hit a distance target with weapons attacks or thrown objects.

Gameplay consists of a 3D cityscape view with your kaiju fighting with an opponent within part of the city. During the Story mode your kaiju can acquire various power surges which give you various abilities to inflict more damage on your opponent. Critical mass raises your attack level once you’ve collected enough crystals from the gameplay area. The four different types of crystals found in the arena will either replenish your health, replenish your energy, increase your critical meter (to reach critical mass), or affect your faction. The gameplay in the brawl game mode is similar to the story mode in battles of up to four computer and/or human players.

The graphics of the avatars themselves appear to have gotten most of the time and effort in direct contrast to the arenas and animation. Each kaiju looks pretty good but then again that’s in relation to some pretty simplistic fighting environments. The overall interaction between avatar and environment lacks the finishing touches that can make you feel a part of the environment. Instead we are treated with buildings that are there one second then gone the next, fighting moves that inexplicably find my character in mid air and then unresponsive on the ground for a few seconds. The movements of the kaiju appear fluid only when starting from the default stance but look choppy and pasted together once several moves are strung together in a sequence. The graphics could’ve been the one bright spot in this game had the extra time been taken to improve the environments and improve the mechanics of environmental interaction.

The background music appears to be the latest metal a la fromage which adds to the distinct bad aftertaste this game induces. The sound effects are fairly standard but nothing special as buildings crumble or hits are landed. The various kaiju screams sound genuine but still annoyed me as I tried my best to make sense of it all.

Godzilla: Unleashed is not a game I can see myself purposefully playing again. The only saving grace for this title may be in the fact that it is (as per the ESRB rating) suitable for younger gamers who normally won’t mind the button-mashing confusion. For a more mature gamer such as myself, I’d prefer to read a book (shudder) than soil my PS2 consoles with such garbage. Not even worth a look.